vitalized

dear Infinite One,

i barely have words for You.  where shall i begin?

ok, ok.  first of all, thank You for always being... here, You, love, forgiving, gracious... i could go on for always, i think.  thank You for putting up with me all the time, and for seeking out the best in me.  thank You for showing me the heart cause of my fear.  thank You for revealing its foundation for what it was: a craftily woven trampoline of lies.  thank You for providing for me, even when i thought You didn't.  thank You more than anything for my Family.  had i ever known life before?

help me to have confidence.  not in myself, but in You in me.  and You around me.  help me to experience You more fully every day.  if You are willing, let me be the tool You use to make a difference in someone's life.  help me be sensitive and responsive, so i can hear You calling me.  and especially help me to keep this mentality.

one more thing:  in response to Your invitation, yes absolutely.  i am ready to be less long-distance Facebook friends, or even blog followers.  i want to live life alongside You, breathing in Your air, watching You work, and living as friends.  time for more than a virtual relationship.  i didn't exactly realize what i've been missing out on, but i'm ready to start striving for something new, unworthy and flawed and unfaithful as i am.  i know that You can use even the most unclean (well... spiritually i guess that's not really a gradient).  for those who know You, You see only the beauty You designed.  so, here i am.  make me that--the person You had in mind.

here i am.

love,
Your friend and disciple