i do not care what you think

[12/29/14 2:20 am]

normally, i would agree with this kind of attitude, or at least i mostly used to.  so often, people are so wrapped up in what other people are thinking of them, they almost completely lose their sense of individuality.

this is not a new concept to mankind.

but the thing wrong with this post's title is that even though those insecurities are often subconscious, there are some very good reasons for them.

dun duN DUN!

ok, maybe not so much "oh my gosh!  everyone is wearing blue today.  what will they think of me if i wear.... GRAY???" *GASP*

but something like this is actually valid:  "everyone is watching this movie [playing this game, reading this book, doing this thing, whichever cliche you prefer], which goes against a lot of things i stand for.  what will they think about me if i don't go with them?  what will they think about my values if i do go with them??"

or even: "i'm making this decision and i don't care what anyone thinks!  except... if i completely disregard everyone else's opinions, how will that affect my relationships with them?"

bottom line:  everything i ever do is pretty much guaranteed to stir thoughts in people.  some will be positive; some will be negative.  i cannot spend my entire life worrying about these things, because they will always conflict in some way.  so in a way, i still agree with not caring about people's opinions.  only, i would word it differently:

"i care very much about what my words and actions say to other people about me and about the things they associate me with.  but that doesn't mean i care about their approval."